I'm not sure what my deal is lately, but I've been getting freaked out about the smallest things, and I'm constantly on edge. We've had these teenage brats hanging around the past little while which also creeps me out, seeing as a lady in our neighborhood was broken into and beat half to death a little while ago. Lucky for me the neighbors have an extra gun that they're letting me borrow until Luke gets home and we can get our own.
Yesterday I had another ultrasound to check on baby Ivan's VSD. I got there at 0715, and was done by about 0745..the tech I saw totally sucked. Turns out though that the VSD is still there- originally it was around 2mm, yesterday it was up to about 4.5-5mm. She told me not to worry about it, that everything would be fine..but seriously- what momma in her right mind would NOT worry when her precious baby has a hole in his heart that's only getting bigger?! I'm lucky that it was so early in the morning- it meant less traffic leaving post for me to deal with as I was pretty upset.
Here lately with everything going on out here- Luke being gone, the VSD deal, all the depressing rain- for some reason I've started having panic attacks again. I had another one this morning, and I really don't know why. I was planning on going shopping with Ashley- even just hanging out- but after I calmed down I could barely drag myself out of the house to take Stinky for a walk.
Hopefully today will get better!
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